Be free, Luisa!
by Leanoranda
Summary: Italy wants to surprise his Germany, but when he arrives he sees her crying. The blonde surprises him with a tragic truth. Italyxfem!Germany,


Italy was happy. Today he was going to see his beautiful Germany again, he had spend a few days at his brother and wasn't able to see his blue-eyed Germany. But Italy knew, today I was going to be a surprise, because she though that he was going to spend his last night at his bother. But his brother visiting Spain. And Italy didn't want to be alone, so he decided to visit his beautiful, strong and strict Germany. He would probably catch he while cleaning or doing the paperwork she didn't finished at her office. She was always working, maybe he could convince her today to relax a bit.

So he was happily jumping to her house. On his way he was greeted by some Germans. They were smiling and very friendly. Not like the Germans sixty years ago. They were unfriendly and hated people who weren't German. But his Germany always apologized for them, so he wasn't mad. It was because of her boss. He had been a racist, and poor Germany had been suffering under him. He had made her cry and she even killed him. But there had been a scar and pain, and after that, Germany started to use drugs and alcohol to make her body numb. Normally her brother would have helped her, but he was captured by Russia. But after a while (and a lot of crying with the blonde woman) she and Prussia became one again. After that the shadows under her eyes vanished and she even smiled. And when Germany smiled, Italy was also happy.

And when she smiled, he knew, that she had overcome her past. He was so sure, he would have made a bet which includes a pasta-diet.

Soon he was able to see the house of his friend. She had a normal house, like her neighbours. He was sure, that some of them even don't know, that that was not only Luisa and her bother Gilbert Beilschmidt, but also Germany and Prussia. The personification of the country they were living in an the ex-nation.

The first thing he noticed was that Prussia wasn't at home. His car wasn't there. Probably out with France to mock Austria and drink something.

He was so sure that Germany would be sitting at her desk and work. Maybe she would be happy to see him, even if he distracted her from work.

Since war she had lighted up a bit and wasn't any more so strict. She sometimes even did the siesta with him and they cooked together some pasta with mashed potatoes. Prussia had been also delighted that his sister wasn't any more the stick in the mud. But then he had gotten into the over-protective-older-brother-mode. And he became a real pain in the ass. It was funny how they had change, well until Prussia founded Italy in her bed and had beaten him nearly to death. At least Germany had slapped him for doing that, but she also been angry because of Italy for breaking in the house. After that incident she had given him a spare key, so that he didn't needed to break in the house.

And now he was going to used his beloved spare key. He was extra-quiet, just to make the surprise perfect.

But when he entered the house, he could hear quiet sobs.

Without hesitation he ran up the stairs and into her bedroom. But she wasn't here. The bed looked like she hadn't used it in days, there was bit dust a the sheets. The next room he inspected was her office. The sobs were louder, but he couldn't see her. He fully entered the room.

"Germany? Ve~ are you here?"

He heard her inhale deeply.

"Italy, is that you?"

She had crawled from under her desk and hugged him. Italy was slightly taken off guard. Germany never shows her affection like this.

But then he smelled her.

Her normally sweet scent was covered with alcohol, and he directly knew she had been drinking. But why?

"Germany. Why are you drunk?"

He grabbed her shoulders and stared into her blue eyes. She laughed and pointed at the calender on her table.

"Today was the day."

She started sobbing again and cried at his chest. His shirt soaking up all her tears he was slightly confused and had no idea how to calm her down. He looked over to the calender.

January 30th.

Probably also the reason Prussia is out for drinking.

He wrapped his arms around her fragile frame an stroked her back in comforting circles. She had keep on crying, some of the emotion only unlocked due the alcohol she had been drinking.

"Shh. Everything is fine. It is all over."

He tried to calm her and it seemed to work.

Half an hour later he had succeeded in carrying her into her bed. He had tucked her under her white blankets and was making tea for her in the kitchen. After the water boiled he looked for a flavour she liked and decided that today it'll be simple green tea to calm her nerves. He put everything on a tray and walked again upstairs.

When he returned to her bedroom she was sitting again, the blanket only covering her legs.

"Why, Italy, why is everyone still so good to me?"

He couldn't answer her that question. He knew from his side that he loved her. But why America and the rest didn't hate her, he didn't knew.

"Ve~ they had probably forgiven you. They had realised that your boss was the bad one, not you."

He hoped that the answer would calm her. Even if it wasn't true. Then she looked up, tears again dwelling from her beautiful eyes.

"You know, Italy. There is something I never told someone. Not even my Bruder."

She started sobbing again. Italy only put her tea on the night stand and laid himself next to her.

Hugging her waist he drew her closer to himself and smiled when she hugged him back. But he wasn't prepared for that, what he was going to hear.

"My b-boss. Ja, he was bad, b-but... I still don't understand why I followed him, even after..."

Her voice broke and she was crying again.

"You don't have to tell. If it hurts so much."

She sniffled and shook her head.

"B-but I want to."

He bend down to hear her muffled whispers.

"He raped me."

Suddenly Italy was deaf. He didn't heard her crying, her pleas for comfort. He hugged her in a bone-crushing way.

"He said, that if I don't kill, he would rape me again. I had no power. I was so selfish! I didn't want to suffer and killed. Oh Gott. I killed children. Innocent People. I..."

And then she started screaming.

"_He raped me."_

"_I was so selfish!"_

He looked at her crying form. Did she really hide all this emotions the whole time. Did she really locked herself up like this. And was that the reason, she had did everything she did in Word War II? He suddenly felt dizzy and sick. The imagination of _him _scaring her, blackmailing her, destroying her...

Did she was selfish? He wasn't sure. Maybe. But it was human. Especial for a woman. But to rape her, just to gain the control over her.

He tried to pull her closer, so that she could feel him. He warmth.

"Shhh. Cry all out."

He quickly kissed her forehead and pulled her again closer.

_Dark was the room where he was celebrating his victory. It was strange that Göbbels and Göring had left already and that the two were alone, but she didn't mind. He was her new boss, and so she had to hear at him._

"_Luisa, ohne dich hätte ich es nicht erreicht."_

_He brought up his glass to cheer with her._

"_Sie schmeicheln mir, Herr Führer."_

"_Prost."_

She couldn't remember what happened after she passed out from the beer. She had woken up again after he tied her up and well... She didn't want to remember. But it wasn't the only memory...

"_Mein Führer, ich kann das nicht!"_

_He slapped her face, so that her body fell to the dirty ground._

"_Mach es jetzt!"_

_She looked next to her. There was a woman and her daughter. The child was loud and crying. They were bound to a tree. The only thing she had to do was to aim with her weapon and pull the trigger._

_Slowly she stood up and walked towards the screaming mother and her crying child. Before he could shout at her she had cut the ropes and the prisoners had run. _

_He was mad, she could feel it. He would hit her for being pathetic. _

_And he would... But not yet. He would wait until night and go into her tent. She had still time._

_She last think she noticed before she fainted was his gun at the back of her head._

Currently it was the 31th January and she had ended up sleeping next to Italy again.

_So, it wasn't a dream..._

He really had been there to comfort her. But that means she had also told him... She brought up her hands to her lips, hoping she didn't showed her weak side.

Not in front of Italy. He needed her as a strong person. Not as a person who cried.

Suddenly her door was thrown open.

"Luddy, (hics), gute Nacht!"

And the door was slammed shut again.

Germany knew, Prussia wasn't either good to speak about the 30th. Both hated the day, she maybe a little more. And both had their way to cope with something simple as a date.

He always goes drinking and came back at the next day.

She would lock herself up and cry the whole day. But yesterday Italy was there to comfort her. Was this good, or bad? She didn't know. She was only happy that someone helped her, even if it was only a little.

"Ve~ would Germany like some pasta?"

She was shocked for a moment, bur relaxed short after.

"Nein, nicht jetzt."

Her mother-language slipped again.

"I meant..."

"I did understand you, ve~"

She really forgot sometimes that he knew basic words.

She suddenly felt how tanned arms wrapped around her waist and pulled her back into the bed. Without a word she turned towards him, her eyes locking with his.

"I'm sorry."

It was a whisper, but Italy was again shocked by her words.

"For what? You did nothing wrong."

She shook her head. Was he really so dense?

"I did. I let my Emotion slip. I shouldn't."

Italy felt sick. When did she learned something like this. It wasn't Prussia's style either. He would have slapped her if he heard what she said.

"Why? I always let my Emotion out."

She shook again her head. Blonde hair was dancing with every movement.

"You are Italy. I'm Germany. I have to stay strong."

She was whispering. And he felt so sad. Why, why did she told herself not to be free.

"You don't have to be strong. Not for me."

She bit her lip. Why didn't he understand?

"I don't want it happen again. I have to be strong."

And finally it made click at Italy. His eyes watered. And he was going to cry for her. An he started wailing and sobbing.

"Italy, stop. Why do you cry?"

She was a little in panic, why did he reacted this way?

"I cry for you. If you can't (sob) I'll do it."

"But this is absolutely ridiculous! Italy stop."

She wanted her voice to sound strong,but she wasn't sure.

"Then you have to stop too."

"I don't do anything."

He shook his head.

"Nobody will ever rape you again. If he does, I'll rip his balls off and serve them your dogs. Now be free, Luisa."

He had never used her given name. Tears were swelling in her face and she was going to cry again.

"_Be free, Luisa."_

But no, she couldn't, she didn't want to be weak. Even if this meant locking away emotions and being captured. But then she felt hot streams on her cheeks, and before she could react, she was sobbing heavy.

"Feli... Hold me, please. I don't want to be alone."

It was afternoon when Prussia woke up. He had a heavy hangover, and his headache could kill an elephant. But that cat wasn't his only worry. He stumbled to her room, just to check up West. He knew that was a hard day for her to, and of course as a older brother he had to protect his little West. But she wasn't in her room and he went downstairs. At first he was hit by the smell of pasta. Was this pasta-loving freak again here?

He heard his voice and got angry. Why did West gave him the spare key again? To make his live hell when he had a hangover?

"Okay, Pasta-Idiot. Leave my sister, and my home."

He was hit by the brightness of the kitchen window and had to step back. However, his small sister only laughed and the Pasta-Idiot smiled one of his I-am-dumb-but-do-not-care-smile.

"West, muss das sein? Gibt es nicht mal einen Tag one ihn?"

She shook her head.

"Ich weiß, er nervt, aber lass ihn, großer Bruder. Immerhin haben wir nen Koch."

Italy didn't understand what they were talking, but Prussia chuckeled. They ate together and talked about simple things.

In the evening, Prussia retired early, his hangover still to powerful.

Italy and Germany sat in the living-room, cuddling under a blanket and watched the fire dance in the fireplace.

"Italy."

"Ve~?"

She pulled him closer and looked into his eyes, before placing her sweet lips on his.

A bit shocked he opened his eyes. But then he closed them again and deepened the kiss. But she lifted, much to Italy's disappointment her lips again. She leaned into his chest, drawing subconsciously circle with her hand. Her pulled her closer to himself before he started thinking.

"Don't think about it, Feliciano. I'm serious."

"Ve~?"

"I mean it."

She didn't looked up to his eyes.

"If it is about yesterday, I won't tell a human life."

She giggled. Although it didn't fit the blonde woman, it sounded nice. And Italy smiled. He likes everything that sounds nice.

"Dummkopf. I mean I'm serious about us. Unless you don't like."

The last part was again a whisper.

He pulled her again closer.

"Luisa. Say it."

Out of nowhere she was deep scarlet red. And she was shaking and fully under Italy's mercy.

"I never was good a showing, or speaking about emotions. Italy..."

Was she whining?

"Just say it. It is not hard. Ti amo, Germania."

And he kissed her, with all his love. She could feel it.

"Say it."

He didn't forced her, but his voice was demanding.

"I-i-ich...:"

He kissed her again.

"L-lieb-be..."

He didn't stop.

"Dich..."

She sighted relived and gave in and kissed him back.

Then he was the first to pull away.

"Ve~ and what did that mean?"

The tension was suddenly so thick.

"Du gottverdammter Vollidiot! Ich schütt hier mein Herz aus und du Dommkopf hörtst nicht zu. Ich liebe dich verdammt. Arschloch. Das heißt soviel wie dein drecks Ti amo!"

And even she had a yelling-fit he stopped her by kissing her like a real Italian.

* * *

><p>AN okay, that my first ff in english. Just say if something isn't right. I'll fix it at my best ;)

Ah,and the translations:

Bruder: Brother

Luisa, ohne dich hätte ich es nicht erreicht.: Luisa, without you I wouldn't have reached this.

Sie schmeicheln mir, mein Führer.: You're flatter me, my Führer

"Mein Führer, ich kann das nicht!": My Führer, I can't do that!

Mach es jetzt!: Make it, now!

Luddy, gute nacht: Luddy, good night.

Nein, nicht jetzt: No, not now.

West, muss das sein? Gibt es nicht mal einen Tag one ihn?: West, do that have to be? Isn't there a day without him

Ich weiß, er nervt, aber lass ihn, großer Bruder. Immerhin haben wir nen Koch.: I know, he's annoying, but let him, big brother. At least we have a new cook.

Dummkopf: Idiot

Ich Liebe dich / ti amo: I love you

Du gottverdammter Vollidiot! Ich schütt hier mein Herz aus und du Dommkopf hörtst nicht zu. Ich liebe dich verdammt. Arschloch. Das heißt soviel wie dein drecks Ti amo! ; You god dammit Moron! I tell you everything from my heart and you idiot don't listen. I love you, asshole. This means the same as your damn Ti amo.

(I actually heard Germany cursed in the English dub. I think it's episode 27 where he says Arschloch.) ;)


End file.
